Blow, wind; blow!

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I'm Learning

Remember this? Well, friends, I've come a long way from destroying a baked potato to creating edible masterpieces... or at least edible food. And I plan on continuing down this path of learning the art of cooking and baking.

In fact, one of my friends mom decided to start a cooking class with all of us girls. It is so amazingly awesome because:

1. Lori is a GREAT chef
2. So, we aren't just learning how to cook elementary dishes... they are extravagant... yet, amazingly easy
3. We get to hang out, laugh and learn all at the same time... it is brilliant.

Yesterday we met and created a Mediterranean feast including: Hummus, Spinach/Artichoke/Parmesan dip, Tri Tip Steak, Italian Bread Salad (SOOO GOOD!), Green Beans and Toasted Almonds, and for dessert?

Cream puffs!! With home made chocolate fudge and whipped cream to go on top. It was delicious... and SO incredibly EASY it blows my mind. I will most definitely be making these again sometime very soon.

Yes, I am learning how to cook. And it is so fun. Next on the list? Cheesecake. Enough said.

Because He Responds

They say, "be careful what you ask for because you might actually get it."

Well, that's how I feel sometimes when it comes to prayer and God... because He responds.

Some of you know that this summer marked the end of a 6 year journey of serving Westminster's youth ministry. Wow. That number 6 still seems remarkable to me... a lot happened in those 6 years that I will always treasure. 

Now that I've taken a break from "ministry," I often get the question... "where are you going to serve now? What's your next step?"

Well, one thing about ministry is that when you're in it, you kind of feel like you can check off the "service" box as complete. Like, yeah, of course I'm serving others all the time because... gosh, I'm a part of a ministry! I serve these kids and therefore, my job is done. And while yes, that is undoubtedly true... I was serving those kids with all my heart and I do not want to diminish or devalue that truth... I think a part of me forgot what it really means to serve everyone else. That's a much harder "box" to check off.

So, that's my answer. This next year is about service and re-learning what serving others really means. And I can tell you already... even though its only been about a month... this is going to be a difficult year of learning. It's hard to admit, but the truth is that I jumped into this year of "service-discovery" without first realizing what I was signing up for. And to be honest, I think it had to be that way, otherwise I'm not sure I would have chosen it. 

You see, God responds when we commit to something, when we decide to do something and when we ask for help. And that's when He begins to put things in our lives that requires us to step outside of ourselves and actually learn what we've asked to learn. 

And that's why this is hard. Because service requires selflessness... and if you know me... then you know that's something I struggle with. Selflessness.

But I do want to learn. And so I'm going to try. Its proving to be difficult. 

But God responded. So, now its my turn.

 

Hypocrisy: Still learning but here are some thoughts

I'm nervous to post anything on this topic... and to be honest, I don't really want to, but something makes me think I need to. So, here it is. I'm sure not everything I write will be truth as I am still learning, but I extend my trust to you and ask for your open heart and mind to these random smatterings of thoughts on hypocrisy.

Here we go...

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One of the biggest objections that many people (non-believers and believers alike) have against Christians is that our lives are saturated with hypocrisy. We say one thing, but do another. We proclaim that sin is wrong, and then turn around and sin against someone we love. We put ourselves on a pedestal because we are "saved," while condemning everyone else for being full of "sin." Then, we turn around and are selfish, prideful, drunkards, gossipers, full of hate, searching out instant gratification, and finding fulfillment in selfish ambition and vain conceit.

We cannot deny that this is happening... because it is happening. It's a dark and painful truth. But its real. Therefore, it must be brought forth into the light. It must be discussed. If left under the rug, it will only brew more hate and confusion in the hearts of men. That is why I write on this topic. May this be the platform that prompts discussion so that we may be challenged to learn something new together.

Ok, so here's the thing. All of us sin and will continually fall short of the mark. Regardless of whether we do or do not believe in Jesus, we undoubtedly do wrong. Every day. Multiple times. Maybe even the same thing multiple times every day. There's just no getting around it. We will all repeatedly sin whether we purposefully seek it out (because sometimes we do), or even when we desperately try not to (because sometimes we will just give in). We are stuck in the struggle to do what our flesh desires and what our spirit was created for. Therefore, "Christians" will, by unfortunate default, live hypocritical lives until we are reunited with Jesus in Heaven.

So, yes. Christians are indeed hypercritical. I am in fact a hypocrite. Despite the truth that the desire and longing to live a right life runs deep deep deep within my heart... I often sin. I do what I proclaim to be wrong or harmful or self destructive or prideful... because sin will always be knocking at my door.. and sometimes I don't have the strength or ability or desire to deny it and leave it on the door step. Instead, I'll answer and take part.

And if I'm expected or asked not to be a hypocrite, then I am essentially being asked to be perfect. And there is only one person who has ever lived a perfect life on this earth... and that is Jesus.

I am not Jesus. And therefore, I will never be able to live a blameless, sin-free life. This is a humbling truth because it means that I will fail in my journey to obey Jesus because I love him and want to do what is right. But I will fail. Every day even.

Perhaps people have a misunderstanding of what Jesus asks for. Perhaps some believe He calls us to perfection, and, because they know in their hearts (like I know in mine) that perfection cannot be reached, they instead ask and place blame... "You say you know Jesus, so why don't you act like it? Why can't you stop being hypocritical?"

This condemnation is rightly placed to an extent. We are called to live like Jesus, but Jesus does not call us to be perfect. I remember the light bulb that went on in my head when I finally realized this in my own life. But He just does not call us to be perfect. He simply asks for our love and for our honest attempt at living a real life that may reveal His glory and glorify Him. A refreshing truth, isn't it? 

Hypocrisy becomes the type of hypocrisy that many people (and may I include myself too?) despise when it acts as a justification for sin and the provision of a sense of freedom to do whatever we want. But the knowledge that we are all in fact sinful does not give way to a path of acceptable selfishness and wrongdoing.

The knowledge that we are sinful gives way to an understanding of our need and dependence on the only one who has ever lived a blameless life, and yet chose to take upon himself the sin of the world, and die as a pure sacrifice for our freedom.

We don't deserve it. I don't and you don't either.

Jesus' sacrifice is a demonstration of desperate love and grace. He wants us for His own... for all eternity. He chose us, now we each must make our own decision. Will we choose Him?

It sounds absurd! I know it does because even as I sit here writing it I'm asking, "Is that really all there is to it?" The profound simplicity of it all is what undoubtedly causes turmoil in our hearts and minds... because we are creatures of logic and reason. It just doesn't seem rational that we could receive a gift so great and so undeserved by not doing anything. It doesn't take good works.

All that is asked for is love. And obedience comes from love.

And therefore, out of complete love for Him, I jump into an attempt to live a right and blameless life as best as I can for Him. If we choose Him over ourselves and over this world, we may be set free from our sin and from the bondage that holds us back from being all the we were created to be.

And so, may I be so bold to say that I will rejoice over the fact that I am a hypocrite? Yes, I will fail again. But instead of using grace as a justification for my sin, I will let the knowledge and understanding of my failures bring me back to Jesus time and time again. They are the reminder in my life that I am nothing and that He is everything.

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PS: I will write about my St. Helens climb soon! Stay tuned!